So, this chick in my criminal prosecution class had her hands over her ears all through the “rape” discussion today.
Like, it’s not even sex Ed. or anything sinful, but her ass was not here for that, at all.
It was funny to everyone present because in this profession you’ll hear and see worse.
However, it’s just sad that some people are already preconditioned to think that once some body parts come up in a discussion, then a sin is about to happen.
They rather not “hear” about it, like ignorance of the fact ever protected anyone.
I don’t know how y’all do your Christian these days but I know fo sho that we’ll be alright las las.
Anyway, the focus of this post is the recently concluded MTV hit series, Shuga, the season 6. I remember when it was just released on YouTube and I posted clips on my story, someone sent me a direct message citing reasons why she hated the show and would NOT be watching.
She said it showed young people having sex and it had a gay boy in it (a previous season) that it meant they were promoting it and if it were her mother, and the gay dude was her son, she would kill him.
Is your mouth still open? ‘cos mine was, for a long time. First of all, the show does not promote people having sex, it doesn’t show you how to have sex or anything, if that’s what people are thinking, instead it shows what young people are doing these days and the attendant consequences.
See, take it to the bank, young people are having sex, everyday even. Movies are make believe and they only “represent” everyday circumstances. If we don’t act movies with these scenes in it, it doesn’t change the fact that young people are having sex and most, out of peer pressure or because no one talked to them about it.
In many homes, sex education does not exist. Many people learned about the human anatomy from the schools or online, because most parents are too conservative to talk about it. They prefer their child remain ignorant of the fact, to protect them. Instead, these kids learn from fellow kids and because no one talked to them about it, many end up in horrible situations, consequences that last a lifetime. So, yes. We are too conservative, in this country. You’d think that with all the conservativeness we’d be better people, but go figure.
Talking about Shuga Naija, I love how the season 6 showed that actions comes with consequences, like in Princess’ case, HIV and a baby. So, basically if you’re not ready to walk the walk, don’t talk the talk. Okay?
If you watched the show, you’d have seen where Leila and Tobi would have arguments about condoms, he didn’t use them, didn’t pull out and left it for her to “figure out”. She was what? Like 16.
Then there’s Faa, the model cum video vixen, who had to shoulder her family responsibilities because her dad was deadbeat, really. The hazards of her job included getting harassed by men to get by. She practically had to sleep her way through every job, and the one time she said no, she was raped.
There’s Diana, the Queen bee who thought that by dating men with cars, she had arrived in life. She encouraged her friends to go out with older guys and invited them to a party where Frances was eventually molested. She abandoned Frances at the party and tried to blackmail her for telling Corporal Yasmin what had happened.
There’s like a lot of peer pressure going on in this show, a mirror of real life situations. See how Faa’s younger brother had to become a thief because his sister was providing for the house and getting slut shamed a lot at his school.
There’s a lot going on in the show that’s a replica of real life situations, and instead of running off with the idea that it would corrupt your kids or something, can we first look at the positives of the show?
Frances rape shows us that the stubborn fly follows the corpse to the grave. You see those things that other people do and escape, you do once and get caught? Yeah!
It also broached the dreaded topic of early marriage which is becoming a bane in our society. Babies having babies.
Diana’s fake protection remedies, like this is 2018 and people still believe Washing yourself with alcohol after sex would prevent pregnancy – you’ll be very surprised.
Leila going for black market abortion drugs without being sure she’s pregnant first. All these stem from the non existent sex education culture. If we were to take a survey, the only sex education 99% of Nigerian youths had from their parents or schools was the “don’t have sex” mantra. What about the What? When? How? And the fact that curiosity killed the cat.
Faa’s final decision to go to the police was the wisest one. Although I felt she should have drawn the line after the first time with Tobi, as the no glove, no sex policy didn’t protect her from bring raped in the first place. Since society doesn’t protect us, we have to take extra caution and it’s sad that cases like this don’t always resolve themselves amicably as they do in the movies.
For those who prefer not to know, for some preconceived religious notions, knowledge of these things doesn’t make you bad, spoilt, tear eye or whatever they call it these days. It makes you woke!
Imagine being young, 16 maybe and a boy is trying to persuade you to have sex, says he’ll pull out or vodka or gin can take it out. Fa fa fa. Foul. Issa lie. Be very woke!
I remember once, I overheard a discussion where some girls who claimed to “know”, said and I quote “if you play around with a boy, as long as you didn’t actually have sex or as long as you’re still a virgin, you’re safe”
Recent studies have actually shown that the hymen is semi permeable and contact with semen could in fact lead to pregnancy, but then our reading culture is so poor that people still stick to old wives tales, and to that, I say, may the odds be in your favor.
We are the generation of change and I hope that in training the generations after us, we teach them that there’s nothing wrong in talking about “ it”. That they should know about PEP in case they’re raped or fall into occasions of exposure. That when a boy treats you like Tobi does, it’s not love but emotional blackmail. That girls like Leila are already beautiful on their own and don’t need any boy to define them.
I hope, we tell them that when boys associate being mature with having sex or being open to all that lewdness and lecherousness, that they see it for what it is, all they have to offer. That love and Sex are two parallel lines and the presence of the latter doesn’t ensure the stability of the former. That boys being boys will say whatever they you want to hear. That it’s okay to be called Childish because you’d rather not sacrifice your body on the altar of lust.
That saying no is an answer. A full sentence that doesn’t need to be explained.