Marriage is an holy union instituted by God. Hence, it is God’s idea and it cannot fail. God instituted it for companionship and procreation purposes. He wants us to have the best of this holy union. However, studies have shown that more than 50% of marriages are nothing to write home about. Many people are enduring their homes instead of enjoying it.
I have listed few tips below that can help one have a blissful marital experience. Enjoy reading!
1. Let God take the central place in your home. When God is at the center of your home, things cannot fall apart. So, give Him the honour He deserves in your home.
2. Never tell people negative things about your spouse. If and when he/she changes eventually, people will still see him/her as you have painted him/her; in a bad light. This also paints you as a bad person.
3. Never compare your home or spouse with another. You never can tell what happens behind closed doors in that other home you are comparing yours with. Each home is unique.
4. As a wife, never leave your home untidy. It irritates the man, although he may not talk about it.
5. Never take your spouse for granted, you might live to regret it.
6. Never cheat on your spouse, else you might be robbing yourself of a glorious, peaceful, healthy and harmonious future. Proverbs 6:32-34.
7. Never keep quiet in an abusive marriage or relationship. Speak out on time so that your spouse can be helped(yes! Only a mad man will beat his wife, so he needs help), and so that you can be saved from early death(countless number of women have died prematurely as a result of domestic violence).
8. Never keep secrets from your spouse. When he/she eventually finds out, he/she may never trust you again. Genesis 2:25.
9. Never speak evil of your spouse to your kids. They may never respect him/her or honour him/her as expected, and this will have negative consequences on them. The bible says children should honour their parents, so that they may live long.
10. Never allow an argument to go on for days. It ruins the love and beauty in a home. Discuss as adults and settle your differences before the close of that same day the misunderstanding happened.
11. Marriage is a union between two forgivers. Learn to forgive each other and never keep a record of past offenses.
12. Learn to love your spouse unconditionally. Look beyond his/her flaws knowing fully well that you are not perfect either.
13. Never repay your spouse with evil because he/she has offended you. Two wrongs don’t make a right.
14. Never allow people’s opinion about your spouse form the basis of how you deal with him or her, especially if these opinions are negative.
15. Support your spouse in whatever he or she does as long as it is legit. Let him/her know that you’ve got his/her back.
16. Never deny your spouse sex, unless you are both fasting or you have a mutual understanding.
17. Always pray together. Raise an altar in your family and ensure this altar is never cold. A family that prays together, stays together and prospers together.
18. Create time to have heart-to-heart discussions with your spouse. It does wonders and it serves as a lubricant to the marriage wheels.
19. Ensure togetherness is one major ingredient in your home. Use this formular: BEST P^3=» Bath together(when time permits), Eat, Sleep, Talk, Pray, Play and Plan together. These foster love and harmony.
20. Ensure you don’t have misunderstandings in the presence of your children. It paints marriage in a bad light before them.
21. Don’t interrupt your spouse when he/she is disciplining the children. Else, the children will learn to disregard him/her. Join hands together in child training.
22. Never rely on your beating or punishment skills to mold your children into godly ones. Parenting is a ministry and as such, you need the help of God and the guidance of the Holy Spirit to excel in it. Settle this on your knees. This is not to say that you should withhold the hands of discipline from your children. Spare the rod and spoil the child.
23. As a woman, don’t be totally dependent on your husband for everything. Be like the Proverbs 31 woman who wasn’t idle and was industrious. You can plant vegetables at your backyard. That way, you can easily pluck some when the need arises. Just be creative and proactive.
24. Always remember that the first reason why God instituted marriage is for companionship. Genesis 2:18. Hence, find time to keep your spouse company. Go on short picnics. Have a ‘couple-alone-time’ occasionally.
25. Don’t be a ‘PHD’ (Pull Him/Her Down) partner in your spouse’s spiritual, academic, business life.
26. Be humble enough to accept corrections and apologise. The word ‘I AM SORRY’ should not be difficult for you to say.
27. Always reaffirm your love for one another.
Written and compiled by Debby Gbenga-Jegede.