Why do bad things happen to good people?
Somebody tell me why before I burn up the world and all its inhabitants!
Err….i ain’t a terrorist, i am just sitting here at home, devouring my plate of rice and stew and reminisicing….
It was in my year one in the University of Uyo, we freshers had just finished a lecture at Acb room 9 and the whole crowd of greenhorns were spilling out of the room and racing down the stair case to catch up with CHM III practical at Science foundation lab when my inner consciousness leaned over and whispered into my ears.
“Look at that girl, she is so finnnne!”
I cast a flirty eye at the girl;
Her face was gorgeous
Her nose was long and pointed
Her skin was smooth and supple
Her eyes were scintillating
Her legs were long and amazing
Her clothes were mesmerizing
She was a goddess of beauty
A Work of art
I replied, “Oh yes, she looks good, she is off the hook mehn”
“I bet you, you can’t get that girl” my inner consciousness taunted me.
“I can get her!” I declared.
“You see all your male colleagues have gotten girlfriends already and you are the only one without a girlfriend. You can’t get this girl!”
“Watch me get her!” I yelled and I hurried down the staircase after the Goddess whose legs seemed to be floating on the air.
“Hello good afternoon, my name is Leroi, I would like to be friends with you”
Miss Awesome gave a smug smile. She stared at my shirt for some seconds, and said in a melodious tone, “interesting”. She turned around and floated away in the opposite direction.
….Love is like a butterfly……
I am in love…Heigh ho!
For one week, I searched everywhere on campus for Miss Awesome. I even entered the female hostels and conducted a room to room search to no avail…she was mysterious, no one knew her name, her department nor her faculty.
On a Tuesday evening, I hurried to Akpan Ekpo market to collect my Use of English term paper assignment from the typist when Miss Awesome floated past me with two guys.
“Hello, Excuse me! Hello, excuse me?”
“Hey, we met the other day at Acb…please can I get to know your name and maybe get your phone number?”
Miss Awesome eyes hovered on my face and then moved to my shirt and trouser. She smiled and moved on without replying me.
My inner consciousness whispered, “You see, she was looking at your shirt buddy, she was accessing you. You are wearing the same shirt and black jean that you wore on the first day you approached her. It looks like you have only one shirt and trouser. Can’t you see her flashy dress, she is a fashionista!”
“But I don’t repeat same clothes every day. This is just a coincidence! I wear different clothes everyday” I argued with my inner consciousness.
“She doesn’t know that”
I resolved that inasmuch as I liked my current light blue shirt and black jean, I will not wear them any longer.
Hello market, can I get some new clothes?
Green longsleeved shirt for Monday
Red checkered shirt for Tuesday
Grey short sleeved shirt for Wednesday
Blue shirt with white stripes for Thursday
Maroon coloured shirt for Friday
Yellow polo for Saturday weekend lectures
Five chinos Trousers, two black and one blue jeans.
…I have been searching for true love and I am gonna keep right on searching till I find….
For two weeks I wore my different clothes on each day of the week everywhere searching for Miss Awesome.
“Miss Awesome where are you?”
….I don’t wanna wait in vain for your love….
Two weeks passed and I decided to once again wear my light blue shirt and black jean on a Wednesday morning.
As soon as I walked in through First Gate, my candy crush, my chocolate and vanilla crush; Miss awesome was floating towards me from the opposite direction.
Halt one two! Right about turn!
I swiftly marched towards her.
Jeez! For the third time, I am wearing the same cloth!
“Hi, good morning, I have been searching everywhere for you on this campus, where have you been?”
“Really?” Her eyes seemed to inquire as she gazed at me.
Is she looking at me? Does she think that I have only this one shirt and trouser, oh lawd, why didn’t I meet her yesterday when I wore my designers polo and grey Chinos?”
“Excuse me, I am in a hurry, heading to Annex…” Miss awesome said, as she began floating away.
How can I allow her leave? Mbanu! I pulled her right arm…
“Please, its not what you think, I can explain….i have many clothes…i don’t repeat clothes, its just that when I wear other clothes, I don’t run into you. Yesterday I wore…”
“What are you saying?” Miss Awesome paused and looked at me with disbelief written all over her face.
“I am saying that you shouldn’t judge me because this is the third time you are seeing this shirt on me…yesterday I wore…”I rambled on. An onlooker on seeing my facial features would have thought that I was under cross examination in a law court.
“This is crazy! What has your shirt got to do with me? What are you talking about?” Miss Awesome demanded, raising her voice.
“I thought you were looking at my shirt and judging me…please don’t be annoyed, you know I love you so much and i….”
My candy crush had floated away from the scene leaving me in the company of some onlookers…
I turned angrily to confront my inner consciousness but the rascal was weeping and singing:
…some broken hearts never mend
Some memories never end
Some tears will never dry
My love for you will never die…”
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